I dried off, brushed my teeth and got dressed. I grabbed my bag and went up the stairs to the kitchen. She was leaning against the counter, drinking from a steaming mug, with her legs crossed at the ankles. The sunlight from the window behind her made her nightgown almost disappear."Sit down and eat or you will be late."I sat down and devoured the toast, eggs and juice. My eyes were on her the whole time as she stood there, sipping her coffee, in the sunlight. I was hard enough to split diamonds. She uncrossed and crossed her legs slowly while I ate, a little grin on her face, her big jugs jiggling each time she moved.I got up, sporting a huge boner, and grabbed my bag to leave."Don't forget to kiss your mother goodbye," she said.I haven't done that for at least five years. She didn't move as I approached her and leaned forward to kiss her cheek. She moved her face and put her mouth on mine, kissed me, and then I felt her tongue run over my lips. I came in my pants with a little. Q: Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?A: To practice.Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?A: Lawyers accumulate frequent flyer points.Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a terrorist?A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.Q: What’s the difference between a bankrupt attorney and a pigeon?A: The pigeon can still make a deposit on a Mercedes.Q: What’s the difference between lawyers and buzzards?A: Lawyers have removable wing tips.Q: What’s the definition of a lawyer?A: A mouth with a life support system.Q: What do you get when you cross a lawyer with a demon from hell?A: No changes occur.Q: How can you tell the difference between a dead skunk and a dead attorney on the road?A: The vultures aren’t gagging over the skunk.Q: What’s the difference between an attorney and a pit bull?A: Jewelry.Q: What do lawyers use for birth control?A: Their personalities.Q: What’s the definition of mixed emotions?A: Watching your attorney drive over a cliff in your new.
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